


The Great Roomba Tragedy

by illusionists



Category: IDOLiSH7 (Video Game)
Genre: Comedy, I hope, Other, as featured in a zine, general pythag trio nonsense, i think, pray 4 him, yamato has to deal with everyone
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-23
Updated: 2020-03-23
Packaged: 2021-02-28 18:14:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,434
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23251528
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/illusionists/pseuds/illusionists
Summary: iDOLiSH7 finally gets a day off! What could possibly go wrong!Maybe except for a wild roomba on the loose and terrorizing the dorms, or two, or three,-
Relationships: Izumi Mitsuki/Nikaidou Yamato/Rokuya Nagi
Comments: 2
Kudos: 20





	The Great Roomba Tragedy

**Author's Note:**

> this work has already been featured in a [ pythag trio zine!](https://twitter.com/pythagtriozine) out of respect to the zine mods (who were seriously amazing), I held on to this work for a little bit before deciding to post it.

A day off had become a luxury. Everyone beamed when they first heard the news, then had quickly made plans on how to spend it. Yamato swore he wasn’t going to move an inch from bed, while Nagi and Tamaki made plans to catch up on some seasonal anime together. Sogo quickly butted in to remind Tamaki he had a mountain of homework to catch up on first. 

Mitsuki and Iori talked about visiting their parents, and Riku asked to tag along, even though he couldn’t stand the sight of chocolate sometimes.

For the most part, everything was in the bag. 

Everyone bid each other a good night before going to their dorms, and only after getting hugged by Nagi first.

Iori gave Nagi a sharp eyed look before evading his hug. Wisely so, Yamato thought, as Nagi made a grabby hands gesture to Iori, earning him a scared yelp.

  
  


Yamato took a second to linger behind and look at his unit mates-- especially Mitsuki and Nagi. Being with them was second nature to Yamato. From iDOLiSH7, to Pythagoras Trio; having those two by his side was just how his daily life went. 

He’d miss hanging out with them, maybe. Not that he’d tell them, of course. Yamato thought about his day off for a second. 

He could join Mitsuki, Iori, and Riku. 

He certainly would not mind getting treated to chocolate.

Or, perhaps he’d sit with Nagi and Tamaki and figure out what’s so special about this particular anime that’d cause the duo to be late to practice several times before.

  
  


Yamato definitely had his options, but lounging in bed had definitely sounded the most pleasing.

  
  


After making sure his unit mates, namely Mitsuki and Nagi, got to their rooms, Yamato finally retreated for the night. He was going to enjoy his day off tomorrow.

  
  


* * *

  
  
  


What Yamato didn’t anticipate was how his day would start.

  
  


Dawn barely broke over, creeping in through the window in Yamato’s room. His internal alarm had him up earlier than he would’ve liked, but he went with it. Yamato cozied up in his bed. “Five more minutes…” he muttered to someone that wasn’t there. 

  
  
  


That is, until his phone rang.

Yamato debated letting it go to voicemail until he peeked his head up to see Sogo’s name on his phone.

And Yamato was Sogo’s first point of contact during an emergency. He gulped.

  
  


“Sou?” Yamato answered, hoping his unit mate couldn’t hear the drowsiness in his voice.

  
  


Sogo’s voice was unusually calm, nearing deadly so, as he spoke. “Did Musashi get out last night?” Just his tone was menacing enough. Sogo didn’t need to resort to rage to be terrifying.

  
  


Yamato hadn’t even brought out Musashi, at least he couldn’t recall as much, and said the same to Sogo. Yamato could swear he felt Sogo narrow his eyes through the phone. 

“You see,” Sogo started, Yamato could hear some cheering in the background, “Tamaki-kun kept saying he caught a feral roomba. He hasn’t ate his breakfast, and he won’t even do his homework!”

  
  


This was bad.

Yamato checked Musashi’s usual resting spot. His loyal roomba sat in place, as he always did.

  
  


At this point, Yamato wasn’t sure what to say to Sogo. What does someone say in this situation, anyway? Sogo called his name a few times, yet Yamato was stuck with no answer.

  
  


But the universe must’ve been looking out for him, Yamato thought, as he heard his line beep. Another incoming call, though this time from Mitsuki.

Sogo didn’t feel inclined to hang up, despite the incoming call. He fussed a bit before letting Yamato go. “Please get this roomba by noon,” was all Sogo had to say in replace of a goodbye.

  
  


Yamato switched over to Mitsuki’s call, only to hear his unit mate’s eardrum shattering scream first thing.

“It won’t leave me alone!!” Mitsuki cried into his phone. Yamato could even hear Mitsuki’s uneven and panicked breathing. “You have to make it stop!!”

  
  


“Woah, woah,  _ woah _ ,” Yamato could barely keep up with what Mitsuki was trying to communicate to him. “One thing at a time, Mitsu,”

  
  


Mitsuki had only halted his screeching long enough to let Yamato talk. Though, when he spoke again, Yamato jumped a little from the shock of Mitsuki’s screams. “I think Musashi’s gone evil! I know Musashi has! I can’t leave my bed in peace! It follows me everywhere!”

  
  


“Have you tried turning it off, maybe?”

_ Seriously, why was no one trying that? _

  
  


Mitsuki scoffed. “H-hey! Don’t change the subject on me! Come get your roomba!”

  
  


Distantly in the background, Yamato could faintly hear a second voice.

  
  


_ “This is the problem?” _ The second person questioned, sounding disappointed beyond reason. 

Yamato heard some shuffling, and Mitsuki’s (shrieking) voice coming through very muffled. “You promised me you wouldn’t laugh, Iori!”

“I did, and I haven’t.” 

There was a short click, followed by a soft beep, and Yamato could no longer hear the hum of the roomba.

  
  


There was a long, awkward silence until Yamato called Mitsuki’s name. “Jesus, are you alright?”

“Yeah. Sure. Whatever, just pick up Musashi before he goes wild again.” Mitsuki snapped.

  
  


Yamato was midway of telling Mitsuki that Musashi had never left his dorm before he hung up.

  
  
  


It was too early to deal with any of this. Musashi was a good roomba! Always vacuumed what he needed to, never went wild, and would stay put in his appointed corner of the room. 

  
  


Yamato unwillingly hauled himself out of bed to pick up, not one, but two feral roombas that weren’t his.

Of course, even his day off was full of work.

* * *

  
  
  


The first stop on Yamato’s list was Mitsuki. He knew Mitsuki would make Pythag Trio practice especially unpleasant if he didn’t take care of him first. 

  
  


Mitsuki had been curled up in the corner of his bed, looking over in fear to where his younger brother held two roombas with a stone cold face. “If this is a prank,” Iori started by means of greeting, “it’s not funny.”

Great. Now Yamato had another one to take care of.

“Don’t you think I’d have better things to spend my money on, Ichi?” Yamato frowned as he took the vacuums- neither of which being his.

In fact, Yamato would’ve used that money to splurge on the good kind of beer. The type that he’d save for celebrations.

He had a feeling he’d need a drink after today, anyway. 

_ Maybe he would. _

  
  


“If not you, then someone let all these Musashis loose,” Iori returned Yamato’s frown. “It just seems so childish… though my floor is pretty clean.”

Iori took a long, contemplative look at the roombas in Yamato’s hands before deciding to take one back. “I’ll reimburse you.”

It might have been wrong of him, but Yamato decided not to say anything and take Iori’s reimbursement. More beer money for him.

Yamato took a sigh of relief and crossed ‘handle Mitsuki’s roomba problem’ off his mental to-do list. He was on his way out, about to leave when-

  
  


Mitsuki hopped off his bed, still in his nightclothes, and grabbed for the first pair of shoes he saw. “Not so fast, Yamato-san!” He called.

“I’m going to catch the perpetrator with you!”

  
  


He knelt to tie his laces without realizing he tied them together.

And Mitsuki landed face-first into the ground as he tried to take a step.

  
  


Iori sighed as he rushed to help his big brother up. “Take him with you, please?” He pleaded to Yamato. With Mitsuki being right beside him, Iori mouthed ‘I don’t feel like babysitting’.

  
  


It was hardly a day off at all for Yamato.

* * *

  
  


“So,” Mitsuki spoke as he clapped his hands together, “let the investigation begin!”

Instead of going over to Sogo’s place to retrieve yet another roomba, Mitsuki had dragged Yamato back to the starting point- his room. Yamato put a sheet of paper down on his table and began to lazily draw a map of the dorms, as per Mitsuki’s request.

“The issue started here when Musashi got loose,” Mitsuki declared, tapping a finger to where Yamato’s dorm was on the map.

Yamato was sure he had said this ten times over by now. “Again, Musashi, didn’t get loose-”

Mitsuki shot him a minatory look before continuing on with his own perception of the events. “Then Musashi cloned himself, invading all of our rooms,” he moved his finger to his dorm, then over to Iori’s and Sogo’s.

  
  


Yamato decided against telling Mitsuki a self-cloning roomba, much less a self-cloning  _ anything _ , is impossible. Instead, he nodded while pretending to listen intently.

  
  


“What this leaves us with now,” his unit mate began, now sliding his finger over to where Nagi’s dorm was, “is the possibility that the Musashis got to Nagi.”

  
  
  


Considering Yamato hadn’t heard from Nagi, that certainly seemed plausible that  _ something _ got to Nagi, though he was sure it was a case of binge watching anime- not evil self-cloning roombas.

  
  


Yamato glanced over the clock. Noon was approaching quicker than he’d expected. In his defense, he did have to deal with the Izumi brothers for a good while after taking one of the roombas, with Iori asking how to be a good roomba parent and what to name his new child.

_ But if he didn’t get over to Sogo’s soon- _

Yamato shuddered at the thought of an angry Sogo.

  
  


“Can we wrap this up?” Yamato asked. He swore he could see Sogo’s menacing smile flash in his mind, as if that image was sent by Sogo himself.

  
  


Mitsuki slammed his hand down on the map. “And let Nagi die?!” He wailed. Nagi wasn’t always the easiest to work with, but he sure deserved better than to meet his end by self-cloning roombas.

  
  


“I have things to do, roombas to catch and tame,” he smirked, though Mitsuki didn’t quite seem to share Yamato’s sense of humor.

“Nagi’s life is in my hands alone,” Mitsuki said in a voice that was too grave for their current situation. “You’ll stop the Musashi brigade, and I’ll save Nagi’s.”

  
  
  
  


Was the situation  _ that  _ serious? It was more annoying to Yamato than anything. He could’ve still been in bed had none of this happened!

Yamato forced a smile as he extended his hand out. “It’s a deal.”

  
  


Mitsuki grabbed his hand hard enough to make Yamato jerk forward slightly. “We’re stopping these roombas once and for all!”

* * *

  
  
  
  


And so their journey began.

Yamato was oh-so lucky to land the task of dealing with Sogo, it was Mitsuki’s job to check in with Nagi. Would it have been easier to call or text Nagi instead of marching right up to his door? Perhaps. But where was the fun in that? Mitsuki considered.

  
  


Nagi’s dorm lead the way to itself. Anyone would always know whether he was there or not from one simple trick; the anime soundtracks he had blasted could be heard from a great distance away.

  
  


Mitsuki pounded on Nagi’s door for dear life, alternating fists with each hard knock.

… And nearly punched Nagi in his stomach when the door finally opened.

  
  


Nagi enjoyed his off day as he usually would- catching up on shows, farming mobages, and listening to his favorite OSTs. He seemed to have been especially tired today, and must have managed to fall asleep despite the blaring music.

  
  


He jumped back a step, barely able to dodge Mitsuki’s frantic battering, as he narrowed the opening of the doorway. Nagi yawned and spoke in a near-whine. “I was having such a cool dream about being Cocona’s side-kick!”

  
  


Mitsuki stood on the tip of his toes trying to get any peek into Nagi’s room. Hardly anything could have been seen past Nagi’s frame. “Screw that! There’s been a roomba invasion!” He cried.

No evil roombas in sight.

  
  


“Roomba invasion?!” Nagi hollered back with a sudden change from his sleepy act. He jumped, and his hand still on the doorknob, the door jerked open.

Allowing Mitsuki to see what was behind Nagi.

  
  


_ Five empty roomba boxes. _

* * *

  
  


Yamato made it to Sogo’s dorm with minutes to spare until the clock would have hit noon.

Tamaki was laying on the floor, petting the roomba that sat on his stomach as if it were an animal. A pile of his homework was waiting for him on the table, all untouched. The unwashed dishes were stacked in the sink… And a disappointed Sogo tapped his foot impatiently as Yamato evaluated the trouble.

No matter how many times Yamato tried to make Tamaki give up the roomba, he kept on refusing. Tamaki insisted the roomba was his baby and he had to protect it at all costs.

  
  


Sogo had confessed to finding a roomba when he woke up, too, but ended up liking it too much and wanting to keep it. Like Iori, Sogo offered to pay Yamato back.

At this point, Yamato could have cared less who set the roombas loose. He sure would not object to the compensation Iori and Sogo were going to throw his way.

  
  
  


Somewhere, outside of Sogo’s dorm and down the hall, Mitsuki stomped his way over to Yamato, dragging Nagi behind him.

“It was a prank!” Nagi shouted loud enough that it could be heard inside of Sogo’s room.

  
  


“Pranks are supposed to be funny! Go in there and tell everyone what you did!” Mitsuki shouted back.

  
  
  


Sogo and Yamato shot looks to each other after hearing all of Yamato’s unit mates antics. He opened his mouth to speak, but Yamato cut him off as he said, “Don’t give the payment to Nagi.”

  
  
  


Mitsuki barged in with a very upset and pouting Nagi.

  
  


As it turned out, Nagi had no concept what a good prank was, and thought letting roombas loose would be the peak of comedy. It scared Mitsuki, so he heard, which was enough for him, despite nearly everyone keeping theirs for the practicality of it.

  
  


But there was one person that Yamato didn’t receive a call from.

One person who was very likely to have gotten eaten by the roombas.

Yamato gulped hard and asked, “Has anyone heard from Riku?”

* * *

  
  
  


Tenn opened the box from his brother and pulled out the gadget that was sitting inside. “So, you just found a roomba in your room when you woke up?” He asked.

  
  


Riku nodded. “Basically. I figured you’d get more use out of it.”

TRiGGER practice had gotten more intense lately. It left Tenn hardly any time to keep his room as clean as he would’ve wanted. He leaned over his table to give his brother a hug. “Sweet, thanks.”

**Author's Note:**

> if you enjoyed this fic, please consider following me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/xanthocera)!


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